Harry and Draco: The Abridged Version

Once upon a time, there lived two wizards named Harry and Draco. Harry hated Draco, and Draco hated Harry back. One day, Harry said, "Enough of this!" and fucked Draco up the arse. Draco enjoyed it, and they lived happily ever after.

I hope no fest mods will mind if I turn that in in place of all my fics.

Arthur and Merlin: The Abridged Version

Once upon a time, there lived a prince who liked to order his manservant around. "Muck out the stables," he'd say, and, "polish my sword." One day his manservant grew tired of this and said, "I would much rather suck your cock and then stick mine up your arse." The prince was very pleased to hear this, and he granted his manservant permission to do these things. And they lived happily ever after.